You´re sex bucketlist.(warning)

I am Doctor Love. Or just girls think of me as fast food. I´m easy to get, tastes´s good for a little while, and easy to dispose off. Anyways, I thought I should share my experiences to my fellow humans. We´re all going to die, so we might as well have some fun while we are still standing up and not lying down in some coffin.

1) Get a handjob in the back of a cop car.

2) Have sex inside an old medieval church with the pastors daughter.(Don´t worry God will forgive you if you pray 10000 times a day)

3) Get a handjob while you are traveling on the train.

4)Get a handjob while you are traveling on the bus.

Numbers three and four is important if you are a guy, that when you´re little white sperms come shooting out of you they don´t end up in the hair or  sleeve of the passenger that´s in front of you obviously not looking. If it does, don´t tell him or her. Bad idea,If they realise, just lie your way out of it. I tried to clean my sperm from the sleeve of an old lady while traveling on a bus, she noticed  something was touching her left arm and she looked back and saw me. I explained to her that I was just swapping a big mean fly that was resting on her arm, she eventually thanked me. Wasn´t my fault though, the girl I was with just started pointing the hose in the wrong direction so she wouldn´t get to messed up. What a selfish girl.

5)On my 18th birthday I had sex on a cement plant and then when we finished I got a blow job in a cave full of bats. Don´t need to be 18, not a requirement.

6) Finger you beloved partner while you are in line for Space mountain at Disneyland. Or just finger her throughout Disneyland while somebody takes a picture of you two next to a big Mickey Mouse puppet.

7) Have sex in a porta-potty.

8) Have anal sex in a cemetary. It has to be anal, it just adds that more creepy weird exciting thing to the mix while on top of a tomb. But spread your sperm on the her or into the grass, not on the tomb. That´s just fucking nasty.

9) Most people won´t experience this but in case you do, if you ever find yourself in a war zone and you are on watch for the night, masturbate to keep yourself awake. Make sure you´re weapon is on the other hand and the safety switch is off.

10) Maturbate while your flying through the air in fighter jet. Call the Blue Angels and let them pull some G forces on you, that will just give you a much more liberating and satisfactory experience.

 

Have fun and Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

49 comments

  1. Dear Dr Love : What’s wrong with a nice bed? It’s seems so clumsy to be outside all the time, busses , churces, trains 🙂
    By the way is the story of the old lady true?

      1. Ok. By the way..Everything’s ok? You seem low. You don’t have to respons, but hope that you get a good weekend and some good weather!

      2. Just kidding!!! I´m not low, I´m high, the high of life, the weather is starting to pick up good sun and I´ll be starting to do some exercise, some running and push up. Get my body ready for the beach to show my spectacular muscles.

    1. It beats running around Rome…..Imagine if you had a it inside the Coliseum. I forgot abut that one. Dressed up in gladiator outfits while the crowd is cheering.

    1. ha, I was just reading this. I completely forgot about this nutty things I wrote
      some some some while ago.
      I might as well re post it tomorrow.

      Good lessons I gave, use them wisely

      1. How old are you by the way? If you´re a teenager then I´m calling your parents.
        This is mature content, so in case you´re a teen then I´ll let it out and say take your time and don´t do crazy things.

      2. Good, then go and do the whole freaking list. I got to check back on what I wrote, wich I won´t cause I´m too lazy, but pretty much I believe I did all of them.

      3. Stop thinking so much and start acting,Who let the dogs out! U U U U U!!! Don´t you remember that song? I feel old man and I´m only 33, you gotta know that song

      1. Haaaleluya! My prayers were answered. I have to pray for my fellow males, we gotta stick together, women now a days aare going to overpower us. Next thing I know I´ll be in the kitchen the half of the day and the other half playing with small monsters…..I´m old school, gonna make a blog group called “males for males”, sounds a bit gay but I would make it clear what´s all about in the mission statement.

      2. I have no problem with women having the same rights as man, seems very fair. It would be interesting to see that blog group.

      3. You did read my other posts, believe me if I can tie masturbation, with baseball players, them giving back to society and basically tie that to world peace and I don´t know what other crazy thing I said in that post, and calling it masturbation the law of the land, I can come up with some weird stuff with that one, actually thought of renaming it “broga yoga”

      4. You have some funny and interesting ideas, as I said on another post I see no problem with masturbation. I do it regularly and it does me no harm.

      1. That´s good news, tell ya something. Last week, I went to a hotel with this girl and you know who paid? She did!! Not kidding. Having said that, I´m quite certain your relationships are much more healthier.

      2. And the funny thing is that she brought it up while we were having the last beer, I said good, she then thought twice about it and said no. I said I had to catch the bus to go back home, (wich was true, if I didn´t catch that bus there weren´t more going in my direction) so we say our by by´s, and two minutes in the bus ride she calls me and tell me to get down in the next stop, I tell her that I can´t cause this is the last bus out of that town into the town I live, so she says about the hotel that she would pay. Turned out well I guess, nothing to brag about. Gets tiring, yes I´m a horny guy but would be kind of nice to have a girlfriend. But chances are that I´ll probably die alone. So that´s my reality.

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