Inglorious Bastard(don´t do this kids)

Thing we did as kids remember? Or was it only me that did these things as a youngster…..

I remember at age 12 when we stuck a cat in a garbage can, closed the lid on it and through a bunch of fireworks inside. The cat came out good though, a bit of burned smell but overall I think it was a great experience for the thing. Then we graduated to sticking a firework in the cats anus and lit it up, man you should have seen that thing blowing into pieces. Quite a site. For some kicks we would walk around during the night through the old Spanish town which where I live now, returned here after 18 years, well we walked the streets and if we saw a rock nearby and a window beside the rock we knew where the rock should be placed. The hosts of the house didn´t seem quite all that happy though. I also remember going from cars to cars and taking off the “insignias”, you know, Mercedes Benz has that thing on the front sticking up and we took it. I actually ended up in my house with quite a collection as well as some of my buddies. Other kids traded baseball cards we traded car insignias. Just the normal thing kids do. O man, this one was great. I remember Halloween, we would knock on the door of somebody, like all kids do, but first we  would grab a bunch of toilet paper which was all wrapped in dog shit, lit up the paper so when the owner of the house opened the door the first thing he would do would be to stomp on the piece of paper eventually stomping on the dogs shit. School, o yes that was my best. I was great at soccer but at every other thing….didn´t interest me too much. I was more interested in throwing spit balls to the teacher when he or she turned around. . Never was into fights I should say, so that says a lot about my younger me. I was an INGLORIOUS BASTARD.

Just a midnight story(twelve at night here in Spain) remembering my good old times as a kid growing up in a not so very good part of town,actually the whole town is not good at all. I was a cat killer, a robber of car insignias, I vandalised houses…….Just the normal things you do as a young adolescent. Then I´ve grown up to be an outstanding citizen. Or getting there.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.


  1. I had to laugh out loud at this one when I got to the end!!! You were BAD! I’m sure there are some cat lovers you have pissed off to no end 😉 I was pretty “spirited” shall we say, but I got my kicks doing other things. The rock & the window story reminded me of a song I really like . . . Toad the Wet Sprocket’s “Little Man Big Man.” I’ve tried to embed it here – we’ll shall see if it worked 🙂 Take care you ☮

  2. You were a real bastard, I never did those things as a kid. You will get a tirade of abuse now even though I take it you’ve stopped putting cats and fireworks together, robbing insignias and leaving dog shit outside people’s doors?

    One of the biggest little bastards in our neighbourhood, his daughter turned up in my class at college where I teach, she was such a lovely girl, I asked her how her dad is now and she was telling me he has a real good job, they live in a good part of town, they must have a decent home, the kids are decent and his wife her mum recently passed away from cancer. I asked her to tell him hi from me, even though he was a twat as a kid and she came back next day and said “I told dad you are my teacher and that you said he was a twat when he was a kid and it really cheered him up, first time I’ve seen him smile since mum died.” Bad boys come good… sometimes.

    1. haha, the guy smiled….I was a bit of a bastard. But it was in my very early teens in a town where is not the best of towns to say it mildly so for us was kind of normal at the time.Looking back, if I saw a kid doing that I´d probably smack him, a little smack that is. Although there were´t any murderers of cats, that was just to add a little off the charts value to the story.

  3. I don’t like the cat story part, we’ll leave it at that.
    We all did dumbass things as kids, memories that last and stay frosty.

    1. The cat thing was more for shock value, I knew it would piss a lot of people off. Just wanted sort off to test how many people it would piss off. We didn´t kill any cats, at least not me, but it is true of putting them in the trash bin and throwing in the firecrakers. It was a not so good town to say the least, still isn´t, so for us seemed normal at the time. Now looking back is off the charts at that age or any age for that matter.

    1. it isn´t the best town, a lot of bad boys and gals, so for us seemed sort normal at the time. Now it seems obviously abnormal. The killing of the cat by putting a firecracker in the anus, that was just to add shock value. I didn´t do it, but we did know other group of kids who did it.

      1. haha, I hear you. I remember as a kid we used to throw huge dried mud blocks at buses…so dangerous, I don’t know what we were thinking…fun though! Guess you’re just a lot more wreck less as a young one!

      2. That´s pretty dangerous, I think you out did me. Damn. Yep, as kids we, or some of us did some very reckless things that at the time you don´t think of the consequences now thinking back if some kid would throw a rock through my window I´d probably spank the little bastard.

  4. Ha. Although the cat thing it sad, when my dad was a young un’ he used to drown kittens cause no one could afford to keep them…. Yours was for a different reason but…I understand.

    1. I never did it, but we knew of other group of kids that did it, it wasn´t and still isn´t a good town. A lot of bad things going on so for young kids those things at that time seemed normal. The least of what others did to tell you the truth. Now looking back at it, of course is off the charts. But I must say we did giggle at the things we did like little girls at those ages.

  5. The animal abuse got to me – do not wish to have you in my feed anymore. Thanks for understanding

  6. Where I lived when I was 10-16- kids did that with cats and also tumblrfthem in the dryer.
    It was an area where kids scratced cars and the teenagers robbed the local stores. If I was afraid to live there. No. I didn’t have any anxiety or panic by that time. My so called “new friends” when we moved there…was on drugs and criminals. But they saw that I was a naive hopeless caracter who didn’t even smoke, so they never asked me to join them at their drugparties. But I remember joining them to “Buy milk” one evening. They didn’t say that the store was closed and they were not intending to ring on the doorbell, until they smashed the window. It was not a good area for any one. It was one of those little surburbs someone planned and built meanwhile God and the architects was on vacation.

    By the way, when I was 5 my brother and his friends, burned ants with a magnifying glas in the sun…

    1. Just stupid crazy youngster things, I just thought I´d probably see how many people would be SO offended by this incredible cruelty by 12 year old kids, that lived in a very bad town. At least we where not dealing drugs since in this town there is only that. So what would be worst dealing drugs as a kid to other kids or doing some nutty thing to a cat? Both are bad ofcourse, but as a young 12 year old only having known what is like to live in that type of bad environment…..if somebody is so offended like that lady of the blog “Finer Things in Life” which she is so offended that she doesn´t want me on her “feed”she says, because obviously she´s a much better person than me with much higher moral standards and having grown up in the same environment as I had, at leas I got out of that environment and got myself a scholarship to study in the University in the U.S. But she´s the high moral standing of morality. So be it.

      I might as well tell about being in the army and deployed, I don´t remember shooting at any cats while deployed we shot at people. So be it, I´m a terrible person.

      1. You are an absolutely great person. And you know what…what’s wrong with people today…is that people don’t dare to see the dark places inside of us. We all have them. And the persons who get most upset, probably has the most of it. What would that lady do when she was in a war…ask the enemy to take of their hat please?…Can you please wash ypur hands before you attac? I get so extremely angry at those people……
        growing up in a bad a war zone. I admire you for everything you accompished, for every single footstep.
        With that said….I also hope you have a great weekend. And I love you for the respect you showed me through your email today. I write back in the weekend, so you can read when you get home.

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