wondering about women

Humans fascinate me, me included. I´ll try to make it short….fuck that.

I´m not a Brad Pitt, but why do I have sex with a lot of women?
No idea and I´m thinking while blinking…sorry had to rhyme.
I have been in a relationship with a narcissist-psyochopath.
After studying her, and I won´t go into details of what she did to me,
that is that crazy bitch behaviour and she is that. Period.

Also there are women who I myself call ¨normal¨. I can talk with them,
even talking about this other narcissist-physopath, and they will say,
one thing, stop being around her. And they are right.

At the same time, I talk to these women who unlike myself have a husband and kids, good jobs,
and it seems in the outside everything is great.
They are good looking women, and also the wife´s of my old friends.
My real Friends, four that is, and I´m having sex with their wifes while they have a family.
I don´t know, is it my fault? Is it theirs? Is there a gray zone?

After spending too much time in the underworld you might say, the ¨overworld¨, some, not all obviously,
seems to be strange meaning the certain human relationships at the same time it all looks very normal
in their day to day life.

I´m just a tool for them to play, and I guess it is vice versa
we do have fun in the bar talking about everything, and then the sex.
Again, not all, but human behaviour is quite interesting obviously including myself.

Just wondering. I wrote this long time ago and just published it in this great blog.

The only exception, the only perfect woman…..my mother. That you better believe or I can cut your knee.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

6 comments

  1. I don’t know what to say. I do think there are some things most human beings look for. validation and safety and least but not last sentir sentido. I guess it’s a lot of different roads taken to get there. Hugs and take care.

  2. It is just my opinion.. but you will not find the right woman while having “intimate relations”
    It creates soul ties (as God intended) or can I say, it really complicates things..
    You can end up believing it is love, when it is lust..

    1. I´m a Christian myself, and you are right I won’t find the right woman when the ends are sexual. At age 37 I don’t want the right woman to tell you the truth. I gave up on it. I have my God, my family, a couple of friends the rest are just acquaintances and bad ones for that matter but after army. days I went into a downward spiral and ende as I say in this post in the underworld. Now I’m sober so I got out of that world. Although I live in a very small town which is surrounded by drug dealers and the “best”of every household, I rent a tiny room there for 130$ that’s why I live there, and they all know me and I know them. We talk here and there and then I’m out to my tiny room to read, write, and learn. What I’m saying is that very often I’m surrounded by women that to put it mildly are just looking for sex in exchange of something and not always money. It can be drugs, or to crash in your place for some time, or whatever is their need at their convenience just to survive. So that has been my world for a long time. Now out of that world and trying to adapt as before to “normal” world with “normal”, at least not criminal relationships. This is at age 37, so….. I focus on staying sober and taking care of my ill mom, which tragically ironically taking care of her makes me sober. What kind of man would I be if in her last stretch of life I would be out there drinking and doing some other bad things, I would be a coward. So that is my focus not the woman. Having said that, it is my duty to inform you that you have to buy this

      or not.
      Have a great day,very nice meeting you and you do have a very interesting blog.

      1. It is good that you turned your life around.
        God can help you get to a better place in life. Here in U.S. heroine is killing people by the scores.. it is very dangerous to use drugs, they overdose their first time, or get a batch that is laced. so sad..
        You are to young to give up on woman..
        The right one will come your way if you pray about it.. You need a Proverbs 31 woman.. One who is modest in all her ways..
        Woman who will lye with a man for profit, are dangerous as drugs, only Jesus can help them.. Thank you for the book link, I found your blog through Anna’s she is a great writer, and a wonderful woman.

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