disease

Hiv positive?

I will come clean here. It is not all that hard for me at least since I really don’t
give a shit what people think.

I have really and when I say really I mean very really have come to death quite too many times
throughout my life.

Those who have read me would know why I thought I wouldn’t make it to age 25, or 33,
and now at 34 I have lived years thinking I had HIV. AIDS. Because why? Because when
I was out of the army and broke and homeless I fucked and lived with a bitch, and when
I say that word is not that I’m putting her down, that was her job. But she did pay
for some of my things so after my hair started falling, and certain symptoms that
HIV positive have like runny nose or marks in their head, I had that.

Worst is that my uncle that was gay died of this. I’m a Catholic, so screw those who
say gays will go to hell, my uncle was the best person you could ever meet.

So I slept with this whore….for quite some time. I’m not gay in case you wondered, I would say so if I was,
but the dicks is not my thing. But I did live a pretty unsavory life sleeping specially
with this girl that was the town whore, it was mutual manipulation in that relation.
So for years, I have though I had AIDS, after spending the time with this bitch.
My hair is falling, I have a runny nose, I have red spots in my head, and other things.

I lived in denial, but the other week I decided to confront it. And do the AIDS test.

Result came in today, I was already thinking of the worst, the result…………..

NEGATIVE!!!! Fuck me, I don’t have that disease, thank the Lord, and I promise that
after this I won’t sleep with a girl without a condom. I could very well have had it,
but no, and point being that after all those times I was very close to die, this was
going to be a long death, and if the results would have come in positive I would have
probably kill myself. So I’m clean like you’re perfect dream.

You have no idea the pressure that got off my shoulders knowing that I don’t have that
disease, you have no idea, fuck me!!! Happy pappy.

Second or third or whatever I won’t fuck a girl without a condom. You never know.
I feel now that I really have to live life, why I didn’t live it before, because I
thought I already had Aids and I was going to die, and it turns out that as always
i’m wrong, I do feel this time that this is my next life to live to the real fullest,

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

nightmare (poem-prompt)

write-a-poem-to-help-someone-overcome-their-nightmaresPoetry Prompt 7 – An Antidote to Nightmares | Pooky’s Poems

 

You´re going to die

maybe

go to the sky.

 

I´m going to die

probably

not going to the sky.

 

make peace with it

today I feel like shit

my pancreas is killing me

today I hope I don´t travel to the hospital

suck it up like a champion is my capital.

 

So make peace cause your going to die.

 

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses cause I feel like shit.

The waiting game.(poem)

                                                      Wait

                                           You´re the bait.

                                                   No

                                   Getting tired of trying it.

                                                  No

                                   You gotta keep doing so.

                                                 Why?

                                  I only want to say screwby!

                                                 Why?

                                  I want to get by.

                                  I want to say by by.

                                  To the hospital so I don´t cry.

                                             Where?

                             Don´t know they came and went there.

                                                Who?

                             The doctors damn it!

                               What´s up with them?

                               Still waiting for the to give me the freaking papers to sign them.

                               And then what? Yesterday 25 March was told  I was good for them to release me then.

P.S. Is this even considered a poem? It is under the category called “Strange Poems” tough…. I think I actually lived up to my expectations.

Stay Forsty gents and gentesses.