father

My father

I did write this thing some time ago, didn’t know if I had the balls to
publish it, but here it is.

My father, since lately I have done a bit of soul searching….
not really, I did the soul searching long time ago I just need
to apply it in all aspects of life.

My father, born post war Spanish civil war. No money as you can imagine,
he has 3 other brothers that I have never met. Nor my cousins obviously.
That’s a long story.

My question is, how in the world a guy that actually had for legal reasons
get his mother to sign the papers at his age 16, to say to the government,
that he was on his own, emancipation would be the word I think.

The real question, and I do know it and I won’t say more since I think
people are not stupid and they can figure it out. So lets get to the
fucking question.

How in the world does a poor guy gets to be what he got to be?
That is why I’m fascinated watching documentaries of succesful
powerful people.

The thing that I do know since a very young age is that I can’t be like him,
is not in my genes and I’m comfortable with that, but we actually joke,
or better said my mother laughs at
me telling me that I’m adopted. Point being…. there is no quit on him,
hard work, relationship savvy because of his intelligence obviously,and
not book smart since he has a 3 grade education, but street smart
and yes you can say book smart since he read and read for free in public
libraries. And yes, I’m part ashamed to be his son, a fuck up. Also in
my family there is no crying, so the father, is really my hero,
we never talk actually specially about this dumb shit, but I still have a letter
he send me quite some time ago and that is his way I guess to express his feelings.
Maybe, or maybe my mother told him to do it. No pussies here, but it feels
like I’m the pussy, fuck piss wank!

I hope and I will close with this, I can’t change the past I can only look out for
the future, my future nobody elses. As he taught me.

If he reads this he would be pissed off, and this is a 34 year old “man” talking.
And that is that. Fuck it. Forgot, there is a saying that “great men get
to where they are because of strong, smart women behind then”. I probably changed the saying,
so that would be….yep, mommy.

Lets keep on keeping on, whatever my familly thinks, or you or you and the fuckers
that are outside my window drinking in the bar, I have to listen to these fuckers
all night long.

Love you…. what a fucking pussy have I become, or maybe not, plus is the
fault of writing communities to write about, fuck it again. Got to put my
war face.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

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father father don’t you see?

Look at that handsome man,
that is him,
my father… or not, I’ll snap you with a knot,
so I’ll get srerious then.

MY father…what can I say about this man…

always calm
hands never tremble
smart
hard working
funny…in his own way
no self pitty
love his wife
he is great at his job
the bravest person i have known
not in the physical sense
but in the mental strenght
he takes care of my mother
and she actually doesn’t even need to take care from anybody
40 plus years together…damn,
although, how in the world does this guy makes her laugh in the morning?
i will never be him…
but i got that since i was at least 16
so,
he inspires others
to be enterprenours
and that takes some nevers
that a lot of people disserve
that,
my friends,
is a true man.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

Happy birthday dad

images

Yes, that is him
while working,
I never talk about my dad
and I know that makes you sad…..
not much more to say, hey! hold on,
except,
he is quite the man
we never really talk,
but that is his way,
I know he knows I can stay
In this line, the correct line
that is mine to absorb- wich is more than fine.
So I doubt he reads this,
but happy birthday dad.
Actually it was never a cushy mushy cushy relationship,
that is how he sails his ship,
and that Is why I love the man,
specially, the mind he has, a prodigy really,
so how come I came out like this?
Anyways, I hope I am not giving the impression he is bad to his only son,
quite the contrary, really.
Some dads go to the kids game, some go fishing with the kids and all those things.
Is not the case of him, he just loves me in a different manner.
And really, not to be silly,
I´m damn proud of having this father.
Hope is a mutual feeling, I think so.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.