I did write this thing some time ago, didn’t know if I had the balls to
publish it, but here it is.
My father, since lately I have done a bit of soul searching….
not really, I did the soul searching long time ago I just need
to apply it in all aspects of life.
My father, born post war Spanish civil war. No money as you can imagine,
he has 3 other brothers that I have never met. Nor my cousins obviously.
That’s a long story.
My question is, how in the world a guy that actually had for legal reasons
get his mother to sign the papers at his age 16, to say to the government,
that he was on his own, emancipation would be the word I think.
The real question, and I do know it and I won’t say more since I think
people are not stupid and they can figure it out. So lets get to the
How in the world does a poor guy gets to be what he got to be?
That is why I’m fascinated watching documentaries of succesful
The thing that I do know since a very young age is that I can’t be like him,
is not in my genes and I’m comfortable with that, but we actually joke,
or better said my mother laughs at
me telling me that I’m adopted. Point being…. there is no quit on him,
hard work, relationship savvy because of his intelligence obviously,and
not book smart since he has a 3 grade education, but street smart
and yes you can say book smart since he read and read for free in public
libraries. And yes, I’m part ashamed to be his son, a fuck up. Also in
my family there is no crying, so the father, is really my hero,
we never talk actually specially about this dumb shit, but I still have a letter
he send me quite some time ago and that is his way I guess to express his feelings.
Maybe, or maybe my mother told him to do it. No pussies here, but it feels
like I’m the pussy, fuck piss wank!
I hope and I will close with this, I can’t change the past I can only look out for
the future, my future nobody elses. As he taught me.
If he reads this he would be pissed off, and this is a 34 year old “man” talking.
And that is that. Fuck it. Forgot, there is a saying that “great men get
to where they are because of strong, smart women behind then”. I probably changed the saying,
so that would be….yep, mommy.
Lets keep on keeping on, whatever my familly thinks, or you or you and the fuckers
that are outside my window drinking in the bar, I have to listen to these fuckers
all night long.
Love you…. what a fucking pussy have I become, or maybe not, plus is the
fault of writing communities to write about, fuck it again. Got to put my
Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.