interesting

cloud computing rational conversation

images-2

So this conversation actually took place during today´s meal.

“Did you received the email?” My mother asked me.

“What email?” That would be me.

“You know the email of akjjaf”

“No”

“Why?”·

“Why what?”

“Why don´t you answer.” She keeps on.

“I told you I didn´t receive the email.”

“Why?”

“Holy shit mom, why again, why what!! why I didn´t answer or why I didn´t receive the email? If I don´t receive it I can´t answer.”

“Oooo, so it´s in one of those clouds.”

“What cloud? You´re going a bit nuts here, old age?”

“No.” She says very seriously. ” Didn´t you know there are clouds, well it got lost in the cloud.”

Me “What got lost in a cloud, and what cloud?”

“There are clouds.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You send emails and they go through clouds, I guess this one got stuck inside the cloud” She says pointing towards the sky.

MeFoto 330 Let me swallow this conversation for a second…..

Motherimages-3 .

And some people wonder where I get my random ramblings……it´s her fault!! I´m just a innocent by product.

 

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses

 

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Just me not knowing what to write about……

You have been....busted!

You have been….busted!

You drive I pay….it´that simple !

As an old wise man said (a.k.a me)…….so?

As a great Spanish Stallion said to a lady ” You look like art, no the Mona Lisa sorry, you´re a perfect piece of art
and you know why? Art isn´t suppose to look nice, it´s suppose to make you feel something.” She looked at me like I was just let loose from a zoo and almost ran away. Then I went and had a couple of shots of this beauty right hereimages-1 but I came back to charge another lady, hell to me they all are beauties, that´s wrong. Anyways I came back with this faceFoto 290 and said “Sweetheart,never forget you´re a miracle”. She just laughed, but I think it was more because of the stoned face I had. I did add a couple of puff puff the real magic dragon into the ecuation.

By the way my family tells me I look like a criminalyo delincuente, well that place I´m at is not 5th Avenue for sure, but criminal? How the fuck doe a criminal looks like….I have no idea but if that is so then look at this I´m a smooth criminal, a mastermind really Foto 146, a little secret from the picture of me in the black shirt. If you look closely to my left or to the right of the photo right where the white jacket is, there´s  one of these images-2right next to me on  the bench but rolled up into a brown paper. I´m just smooth, told you a mastermind.

I even have made my dogs drink what a drink normallyIMG_1044she has good taste.

So I have decided to dress always nicely a buy a yacht to sail back to the U.S, I´ll have my friend over here smuggle in a bit of  you know whatimages-11, and don´t let the stature fool you. He´s a mean S.O.B.

So my hero? You ask, I answer, my friend Aly boy al-capone-quotes.

Now, I have just killed thisIMG_1460_2 that little bastard had me running around the garden for almost two hours so her death was slow and very painful. I´m just inhuman. And then have a great cigarette outside this beautiful house of …. not mine with the two beautiful farting pissing shitting beast that are…not mineIMG_1364 while I talk with my “contacts” back in New York, you know what I mean?

Damn this is random…..

I´m a narcissist
hanging photo´s of me to exist
you can´t resist
this beast!
Yahoo, news, they said it was going to be sunny
that was a crummy idea to put out, I´m freezing my tale off
and can not keep in a cough.
I´m a smooth criminal…lookDSCN2410
Not being to subliminal here but I just feel like…hum hum hum
for me, I´m kinky even without my whiskey.
I like to do now the funky chicken dance
screw the tranceDSCN2511
there you go with my flow there is no snow yet,
so let´s forget.

Am I that bored today? Foto 330Let me think…..

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses

Who said suicide was easy?

Foto 130 I´m going incognito here, but man. This suicide thing is hard. I don´t know how people do it really.

This morning I decided to hang myself. But then I started looking for what I have seen in the movies you know, a simple piece of rope. I didn´t have a fucking rope in the house! So then I figured ties, and can you believe this, I don´t own ties. I think I haven´t worn a tie in years, not that I think is that I just haven´t. Doesnt´say much about me to tell the truth, fuck am I talking about killing myself…go figure. Anyways, next option I figured was to get pieces of shoelaces tie them up one to each other to create a rope. Bu the problem after that was that it was either too short to reach the fan or too long and I actually touched the floor. Then the freaking fan broke and I had my mother chasing me around the house with a broom. Hell that was scary. So I completely failed with this hanging thing and decided to take a rest since I spent the better half of the morning with the hanging ordeal until my mother chase me away with her not so magic broom but when I was going to the sofa…… IMG_1502 The bastard had taken it already. At least he is a patriotic dog though. He´s from Spain but as you can see he has change allegiances to the U.S. Even though I try to put him this t-shirt my old cool army oneFoto 191 on the bottom it says Spanish and on top Army. Then the eagle….that one just gives me the willies.

Back to the subject at hand. I figured I should jump out the window and get it over with. Hell, I´m afraid of hights. I couldn´t get my head too far off from the window. But I was persistent and I persisted and finally……………………………..IMG_1391bam! That´s exactly where  I ended up. On top of a pile of wood. Which did the cushy thing, look at the aftermathIMG_1400, yeah that´s the freaking aftermath. My mother again, she comes running down yelling like crazy saying I just screwed up her nice piece of rubble of wood and put me to do slave labour. (ladies don´t get to excited about that sexy body) I told her “mom I was just trying to kill myself so I jumped” She looked at me as if I was nuts, and told me she didn´t care that as long as I was under her roof no matter that I´m 32 (that´s a long story how I ended back at this age with them, but I do tend to disappear for a while one in a while…..that´s also some stories) anyways point being is that I ended like thisFoto 274 after the fall, and she could care less, that´s even sadder. I felt insulted really. Does this woman really love her son? At least she could shoot me. That´s what I told her, and she simply replied that then she would be the one going to jail so no way Jose, if I wanted to shoot myself then i should do exactly that shoot me with me.

So a loooong day so had to take a restFoto 315 but then I saw these……… pills and pills!IMG_0959 along with a cool fuet which is what distracted me from the real thing. I was going to go for the pills get an overdose and there is the fuet, here a closer look to one220px-Fuet it´s from the region of Spain Catalonia and is a thin, cured, dry sausage of pork meat in a pork gut. It damn good. So that distracted me, I eventually ended up eating three of those and I was so full and groggy it seemed like I couldn´t even open my eyes  after thatFoto 290. Man was I tired.

So now it´s 6:40 p.m and I have decided to hell with it and to keep on smoking like a maniac that´s why I got theseIMG_1030, yep,they are all contraband cigarettes, they taste like shit but their cheep and they weight this muchIMG_1011

 

So as of right now I´m just going to do the funky chicken dance.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses

Why that badge of honour?

Gays: Why that gay parade, or saying I´m gay and proud. My uncle died of aids he was gay, I was with him his last 2 months in the hospital me and my mother rotating every 24 hours up until the day he died. We never talked about him being gay, he was the kindest person in the world you can meet. He would actually take me out to buy me clothes( when he was in good health) telling me that I dressed like a plumber. He would spend hundreds of dollars for his screwed up nephew. I hate shopping, bores me to death looking at this shoe and that shoe, come on are they white? That´s the only thing I want to know about the shoe. But I went along because I knew he enjoyed doing that for me. And the man laughed his ass when I started telling him my crazy stories with girls and some stories of my drunk stuppors. He always shook his head and said “you´re a mess, clean it” but the man couldn´t stop laughing. Even in the hospital my mother would tell me he asked about me when I wasn´t there. Great person. But not because he was gay, but because of his character.

I could care less if your proud of being gay or not, you´re a good person then great, your an asshole then your a gay asshole. Just like straight people. Just be you, I know the stigma about gay for sure with some people, I have no problem with it, so I don´t understand what the hell is that “I´m gay and proud” what the fuck, should I say “I´m straight and have sex like a wild bunny and proud and even my mother calls me a man whore” no. I don´t. I don´t see the badge of honour of being gay. The rest of the world does not have to bow to you or give you a pat on the back. Just be you and you´ll find people around that love you for who you are as a person. Just pisses me off when some of those people say it as in wearing that badge of honour.

Vegetarians: I have to feel sorry for you, you will never get to taste the Spanish paella and that should be a crime. But again why say, I´m a vegetarian and wear it as a badge of honour. What do I care what you eat or don´t eat. I don´t care. Eat whatever you want, don´t expect me or the others to follow your crusade for whatever reason your doing it, but why say it as in being proud. I don´t go and say, “I´m a MacDonalds addict, I´m a cow eater”. Each to his own and stop lecturing me about what to eat and not and why I´m cruel because I eat meat. By the way have you ever saw a poor person being a vegetarian….I haven´t. Why don´t you go and lecture to the poor Makumbos over there in Africa and tell them not to kill their chicken because is morally incorrect to kill animals because they have sentiments. I´m sure it will go good for you, they´ll probably chase you out there with a stick at the very least.

I could ramble on but….I hit the two targets and that´s enough. 552 words. My fingers get tired. I´m sensitive!!

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

Dilemma on my hands(be advised can be offensive)

Aaaaaa! fuck. This sucks I just want to throw some rocks to my roof and to the neighbours as well or drop them into a deep dark well or drop me into a….fuck, my butt hurts from sitting down or laying down for about 23 hours of the day or maybe even more because I have a broken ankle who does has an uncle and his name is boring. It´s been 26 days like this.

It takes me forever to shower, as a matter of fact I shower twice a week the rest of the week I pass by with baby wipes. Just for the simple fact that doing it apart from taking forever I tend to fall in the shower or the other day stubled and hit the glass door and broke it, so if nobody is helping me it´s a fucking mess. And like showering and brushing teeth, with all the other chores either I can´t do them or if I do them I return back inside the house as if I had ran a marathon, tired as hell. Boring, I read, I write, I watch some t.v, fuck and I like it but damn I also like to go out and take a walk or go to some bar or fuck a chick.

Problem, my parents live in a lovely house but it´s in the middle of nowhere and you need a car just to reach the nearest town which is 2 miles away. I could walk if I could, already did it more than in 100 occasions. I was suppose to move out this month though. Had everything prepared to move out to room with some  other people in the house. Nice people, working people, not the other types I can be with. They had wi-fi, I could plug in my little t.v in my bedroom to watch the t.v in English, the town is a good town which means is not like the ones near my house which is full of fucking Moroccans selling dope, stabbing each other and the bitches that move around those circles. But hey, right now I´m about to call one of those whores and meet up with one of them. If you have money and you pay for drinks and whatever else they want, sure, they´ll meet up. Not the best, but is pretty much the people that I know around here, have known them since little. And as a matter of fact, have lived that life for quite some time.

I´m a hero anybody knows that? Yep, I was a soldier once and deployed( so that makes me a hero) so have been in worst situations but fuck me this is boring as hell. Might as well call a whore if I had my own house or if I lived in that little room I was going to rent for this month if it hadn´t been for this set back of the broken ankle, which at the same time it would be kind of strange for the other people living there seeing a whore walking in although I´d probably have some funny outrageous and semi logical explanation as to why a whore is in their house. I did get a whore to visit me to the hospital when I was there for almost two months. And fucking while you have the iv´s on….damn that was something. You should have seen the faces of the nurses, and they still loved me after that. Crazy Charly, and laughed at the incident. They couldn´t had more fun seeing that in their whole careers. I was giving them the gift of laughter(at me or with me either way was laughter) everytime they came into my room I would say  some random thing or flirt with them. I do tend, not for everybody, but for a lot of people make my mistakes funny and innocent and their quite some fucked up mistakes. But the way I say it and express myself….well, they end up dismissing it. Others just hate it, but fuck them. I´m far away from perfect but I´m quite certain I have more heart and better heart than quite a lot of those people who love flowers, animal tree hugger and kings and queens of morality.

I just need some release! Even in the army you had to release, and most of the time it was when you didn´t have to work( I was infantry), well it was going to bars getting drunk, fucking anything that moved, and when deployed, fuck me the relieve sometimes was just to shoot your gun in anger or get drunk back at base. Yep, we Spanish soldiers at that time we didn´t have such strict rules with alcohol as the Americans, we would get drunk as a skunk after a 1 month of constantly being vigilant and if we had a couple of days off when we were relatively safe inside the base for 24 hours a day without going out, then yes we would get fucked up.

Now if I do go out, it´s a also fucking boring in the sense that I can´t jump from bar to bar seeing some people. I have to stay in one unless I want to call a cab to take me 300 meters up or down the street. So that´s another inconvenience.

Anyways to be or not to be an asshole today? That´s my dilemma. Or better I should have said to act as an asshole not be one, since i can act as one but i´m certainly not one. Certainly by my standards that is.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

What´s the reason for sleeping?

Can somebody tell me why humans sleep. I don´t see the point in it, you don´t do anything except have dreams. Which are just fantasy, although I have to say I do like some of my dreams, a bit kinky but hey at least those are the fun ones. But apart from that what is the whole point of sleeping, productivity in the day is degraded by this monster. Why God or if you don´t believe in Him why in the world did either He created us with dreams or that evolution was also a bit screwed up since it has let us with 6-8 hours of a 24 hour a day being in a comma. So what in the world is the reason for sleeping?……Just a thought I had after waking up from my nap.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

What rhymes with orange?

I´ve been thinking…..first  just the word sounds ugly as well as the colour. I have never seen a house painted orange. Well I just went to google and saw this images. Where in the world is this house at? Probably near the North Pole would be my guess. As far away from civilization as possible, for the simple fact that one people will be blinded every time they saw it and second, it´s just ugly as hell as well as health issues for human being.

And what rhymes with orange, can you create a poem around the word orange….

I ate an orange
that was in my storage
that I grabbed from the hills of blorenge
in Whales, which in the plants was the sporange

Actually only two words Blorenge and Sporange actually rhyme with orange. And sporange doesn´t even appear in the Merrian Webster dictionary and that his the holy grail of dictionaries, had to look that word up in the urbandictionary.com.

Just seems to me like a boring word, and who in the world invented that word that´s what I would like to know, did he or she, probably a she, just to make life even more complicated (just kidding). Anyways, it´s boring, sounds ugly, and Merrian Webster doesn´t have it. Just thinking…..we can petition those nutcases, the ones who are in charge of making dictionaries, who are those people by the way. Do they updated words every year? And if that is the case what does that mean that people invent new words? So you can actually invent words. Going back, we should petition to take that word out of the dictionary and burn that house in the process. It´s already giving my the hivy jivies just looking at it. Just ban that colour, how many people do you see walking down the street wearing an orange jacket and trousers, I haven´t seen any. So why have that colour in the first place?

I invented a word by the way and is not even in the urbandictionary, and it is my pride and glory that word which is “screwby”, makes sense you saying screw you while saying good by or dismissing something or someone and all roll into one. Why don´t they contact me and put that word in Merrian Webster, who are those people who decide what words are worthy and what are not. What are they the King of words, no there is only one king and that is King Kong. So screwby them.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.