man

10 Things that give me brain sneeze.

The earth, round and majestic the kingdom of God. But there are days that I get brain sneeze from practically everything and anybody in this kingdom of the Lord.

1-Mother why in the world will you be running around the kitchen with a piece of cloth swinging it in every direction as a mad woman trying to hit the damn flies?!! Jesus, buy some of that killing spray and spray it in the general direction thereby preventing me from getting dazed by one of your un human swings that tend to end up hitting my head.

2-Woman, why the hell are you so complicated. This girl gave me her number, I didn´t force her. I called today and noooo, she can´t go out this Sunday, she will call me she says. So she says. She says bull sh…t. I´m gonna become gay. Go fags! Woman should be second class citizens, just sweep and clean and get a bean so we MAN can eat healthy, add a burger too.

3-Why do I get pancreatitis and I´m walking around with a freaking tube protruding from my stomach all the way into a little bag I have attached to the end of the fucking tube. It looks strange, I look strange, I look sick like a junkie. Fuck me.

4-Why the hell does my next door neighbour dog starts always barking at 4 a.m? What a bastard, just stop it and let me sleep since that´s the time I normally go to sleep, fucking asshole.

5-Can´t it be legal to kill some people that piss you off? There are a lot of us in this planet, who cares if I get rid off a couple or dozen.

6- Why don´t I fuck more, I use to be quite the fucker, I was good at picking up girls. I lost my freaking mojo. Fuck me.

7-Why don´t I get published. I´m the new Shakespeare in town. Fuck the publishers.

8-I´m tired of the stupid Spanish t.v programs, their soap operas and they last for the hole evening and late night. What´s wrong with my country? Fuck the Spanish t.v.

9-Why don´t I have enough money to buy a a computer that won´t take 2 years to load each page, why did the government fucked up so bad that we are at 27,2% unemployment and that´s the official number they put out go figure what´s the unofficial one, guarantee it´s higher. Fuck my Mackingtosh and the government.

10-America, or Mr. O bama, wama paronama. Just bomb the shit out of Hassan or whatever the hell his name is out there in Siria. If the Iranian´s get a little cookie about it, bomb them too. As a matter of fact Just carpet bomb the whole Mesopotamia who cares. They can´t seem to get their act together. They´re either bombing the infidel of the western modern world or their chopping each head´s off. Fuck´em.  I´ll re enlist back into the army at age 30, with a fucked up back, pancreatitis, tube protruding from my stomach. Won´t even need a rifle this time,I´ll just hit them with psychological warfare when they see me. I´ll hit them in the head with my little tube. What´s wrong with these people?Fuck me.

Death be upon us.

It´s a holiday,

so they say.

I would like to celebrate but I can´t

I just have to do what I can, or can´t.

I need to get a train in about two hours, two long hours of waiting, and waiting until I get to my destination.

Which again is hospitalisation.

Not for me though, for my uncle.

My mother has been with him now for 4 days and me in charge of the house,

She called yesterday at night

and that was a fright.

She is strong as a bull, but she did cry.

And I will probably cry with her, or not.

Problem is my uncles internal bleeding, so he´s bleeding from inside.

And I should sigh, but I can´t. I don´t have time for that shit. I have time to be in charge,

take care of them, be with them, see them, because after almost  thirty years with aids.

I´m sorry uncle, but lets face it, time is running out, But I´ll be there with you when you go out.

I´m a tough mother fucker, no crying, no pitty, no shit. Got to do what you got to do. And that is love them,

be with them, stay with them until his organs collapse. So I´ll be out of writing for I don´t know how much time,

but as of right now it´s not important for mine.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesse, happy thanksgiving.

Worst enemy is uncertainty.

I was thinking today, and since that´s not very common I figured I had to write something.

UNCERTAINTY, what a fuck head it is. I know life is full of it, full of uncertain things the only thing certain in life is that we are all going to die, I made piece with that some time ago, so I should be enjoying life more the problem is that part of my enjoyment is walking  in the path that probably Satan paved. That´s why the fuck I end up as I have.

Every week I have to go to the doctor, and I don´t know what the fuck she´s going to tell me about my pancreas, seems it´s doing better but  the Doc, tells me that even if I live the life of a monk and eating like Angelina Jolie, there´s always the possibility of something hitting me, of something inside my body getting all messed up. So every week I go not knowing if she´ll say `you gotta stay in the hospital for some more evaluation´. And that fucks up my days, staying in a hospital bed, getting flag poles all over my arms(the needles are the flag poles),and since a lot of my veins just don´t work because they´ve been so much pinched and sucked so much antibiotics it fucks them up so they poke me about five times before they find a vein that will work to take blood samples or put me antibiotics, or whatever the hell they want to put in. Forget about the weekly visits to the Doc, I don´t even know if the next day I´m going to come down with fever or stomach ace. Anyways the only thing good about seeing a Doctor is that she is a hottie, man I even think about screwing her while I´m lying down in bed with my arms full of needles, who the fuck has that type of thing running through his or her brain while you’re in a dire situation….Fuck me, it´s just me.

Maybe is my coping mechanism, didn´t happen though while I was being shot at but again there weren´t any women around, they should put women in the front lines, why not? You get shot at, you look at this hot girl soldier next to you, preferably in a bikini type of military outfit, that will pump your moral up and instead of finding cover to later shoot back I would have thrown my rifle to the floor and run across the open field and slap them to death….I´m getting off track here, sorry.

So I have finally got to the point where I compartmentalise things pretty good, I´ve always been good at it though. Don´t know why but  if for example I´m writing and a bomb goes off next to me, I´ll look at the crater say something like `what the fuck, shit´and then keep writing like nothing happened. If I´m focus in doing something I´m able to not let negative influences affect me right then and there, I´ll deal with them later but I won´t let them fuck up whatever it is that I´m doing at the moment. Getting of track again, I have a rule that I don´t edit and don´t do outlines when I write a post(I do some little editing, but very little) so pretty much the words just role out of my head into my fingers and into the computer, fuck me, makes sense?

So what do you do, you live the moment you live day by day and enjoy, so Stay Frosty gents.

A Love letter from a new nominee.

I´ve been nominated for the 2013-Best short/long story post called

I´m a fucking Hero, and you are a dummy.

I´m that cool, I´m too cool to even go to school.

So the nomination I just saw in my little thing up there that pops up when you get messages? Anyways it comes from a person, I´m sorry he is not a normal person he is the MYTH the LEGEND men want to be like him and girls want to be with him he is…..

http://thepublicblogger.com/

 

Mr. Kendall F. Person, I will like to tell you something out here in public. I don´t write about serious things so it´s kind of hard. But you are great guy. I remember you where one of the first people that I met and followed and then you followed me when I started with this blog thing about 6 months ago. I remember the encouraging words you write to me, not only in public but in private. I remember when you wrote the post about bullying and you asked  me to e-mail you with my experience and I did. I remember the good job you did at writing that post like so many others. I remember the encouraging words you´ve send me not only in public but through e-mail, specially the one “Where the fuck are you?” when I spend 2 months at the hospital. That meant a lot really, I´m not the best writer but I must be doing something right for you to give me your words of wisdom. So my friend, I´m really happy I´ve met you. This sounds to gay.

Sorry I only talked about this man, but all you people(81 people that´s fun, who would´ve thought)that follow me or read me, why? Don´t have a clue, but don´t think I don´t appreciate you reading and some comments. This blogging experience is probably the most positive one in my life, the most productive one, also the writing stories sending them to magazines to get rejected. But the blogging experience wouldn´t have happened without YOU people. So thank you.

You know what frustrates me? I want to read all the blogs that I follow and that they follow me in one day or two days and I can not do it, there should be days that last 34 hours to cram up all the reading my fellow bloggers, because their damn interesting to read.

Stay Frosty gents, and thanks again.

Doctor Love. What men really want.

There is this blog by a woman(check it out) called datingdramasofathirtysomething, she´s fun to read. She wrote a piece called What woman really want, and I made the fateful error of commenting on it, so she challenged me on writing what guys wanted. So here you go, this is what guy´s want. I´ll go quick and to the point. And maybe a little crazy.(The letters you see in bold are hers, and then is my reply.)

1-If we love our mother,you love our mother. And the other way around, so you say woman express extreme opinion about other women…that´s the freaking problem, going down the middle of the road is not that bad of idea. Plus you put us in a situation where out of the blue the other girl is going to be pisses off because the guy went along with what the girl said. Screwby that.

2-To be told we´re beautiful. Not on the days when we are feeling low, because we know you´re saying it to make us feel better….Say it when you mean it. Maybe we do mean it when you get out of bed with your hair all rattle up, that is love.

3-..Being dependent on us is a strain we can´t always handle. We are not your mother. That would be a gay guy, but at the end of the day if you love a person you share things with them and support each other. Tell Bill Clinton and Hillary, tell me if those two were´nt dependent on each other to win, maybe this is a bit extreme example but somebody should understand it.

4-Answer the damn text message, Make the promised phone call.That would mean we are dependent on you, you don´t really want a guy that is constantly drooling over you.

5-To be proud of you. Don´t drink to much. Don´t embarrass us by drinking too much.. I can´t be a good candidate  to challenge this point, but I will say that you woman will be proud of your man even if he makes a dick of himself, that is love. Then in private you can smack him around, but in public defend your man. He won´t be always perfect, neither are you!!

6-Nothing is more attractive than laughter… Agreed, although there is a fine line by crossing to the side of becoming the joke of town. So we men have to be careful, and some man are not funny and girls find that sexy, and what the fuck….it´s not all black and white.

7-To be confident in our relationship. We may pretend that we don´t care what people think, but we do. Don´t openly flirt with our best friend in a room full of people… What if we are just being funny and cordial? It´s not flirting it´s being cordial you take it as being a dick and that is your insecurity, if you really believe and know your man love you and only you, you won´t even notice that.

8-To be kissed…and by someone who knows how….. That takes practice so if you get a guy who knows how to kiss you, it´s probably because he´s a man whore, like me, so you pretty much feel your way with whatever woman your with, make her see the stars.

11-We can smell bullshit a mile away. Do yourself a favour and don´t lie to us. Know this is a put down for men, we smell bullshit the same mile away, or maybe even more. Of course we´ll lie, and you know what you will believe it because you wan´t to believe it. Most of the time though.

I´m just writing little fragment´s from her post, and she has 15 points to make about men, there interesting and funny, so I´m being maybe a little…tell you the truth a can´t handle it more. I´m getting a headache. We don´t like to be told what to do, we are men and as men we rule, unfortunately for you we are the majority in the global world, meaning the successful majority. And at the end of the day girls will always be attracted to bad boys. And when I say bad boys I´m not referring to rock stars, I´m referring to a guy that has two good pair of balls, know how to take care of himself,is confident with himself, helps her in what she needs, and he´s the Alpha male. Period. That´s what the fuck is the love doctor is saying after I just got back again from the hospital. But when I saw that comment and challenge I had to write.

TEXTING WORLD.Don´t smile, it can happen to you too!

In this new era of gadgets, texting communication skills and vocabulary is something we all must master, if your young, smart and in college take up a  class about this…. since there aren´t,  start a support group.I If your dumb and old, try it too! You gotta be smart at this texting thing.

-CONFUSED?

What would you do if I broke up with you

Get back with my ex

Now I see how much you care, I´m done

Hey you wanna go out?

Go with your ex

You are my ex

…………………………………………………………………………..

-GET THE FREAKING AUTO CORRECT!

Be advised: I´m  dumping you when I get home tonight

Fine with me. I was just thinking we could use some time apart.

What the fuck Jenna? I go autocorrected. I meant to write jumping you not dumping you

And now you´re telling me you want to break up?

Well this is awkward

……………………………………………………………………………………..

-WRONG NUMBER

Why did you break up with Dani?

Cuz she tried licking my butthole one time and you know homie don´t play that shit.

Ohh. Woww.Lmao

Hahahahaha, I´m joking you got the wrong number

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

HOOOO, GOOD OLD ACRONYMS.

ily

can you please spell it out it make everything more special

I´m leaving you.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

-SPELLING ERROR.

Babe…I think I´m pregnant…

The AT&T subscriber yu are trying to reach is no longer in service.

You know you spelled “you” wrong.!

The AT&T subscriber YOU are trying to reach is no longer in service.

…………………………………………………………………………………………….

BIEBER BREAKUP.

Baby….

Don´t “Baby”me, we´re done

Baby….

Seriously?

Baby…..

R u retarded?

Noooo

Did you really just respond with Justin Bieber lyrics as I´m breaking up with u

………………………………………………………………………………………………

BREAKUP BLOOPER.

Baby, please don´t do this. You have no idea how important you are to me.

I gave you way too many chances. I´m done.

I´ll do anything…

Forget it, alright? We´re octagon.

LOLOL i meant OVER. That was funny but i´m still braking up with you

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………

ALWAYS LET THEM GO FIRST.

Hey

There´s something I need to tell you

Me too. same time. GO!

I´m breaking up with you.

Will you marry me?

Well this is awkward.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………

GET YOUR PRIORITIES IN ORDER…BOYS….

I need to tell you something

what is it babe

I broke you xbox!!

WHAT!?!?

Just kidding I´m cheating on you…

Soooo my exbox is ok right..?

………………………………………………………………………………………..

A NICE BIT OF POETRY.

Roses are red

violets are ble

We´re breaking up because I never loved you.

Why I create art? Life.

At age thirty I have returned to walking through a house of hunted ghosts where people have been and now they are not, not to go anyplace, the place is the house where they have become the ghosts of mine the mind of mine in which they reside as if they feel they  have the privilege to reside in my mind, they don´t have the privilege to be in here in this mind of mine, in this house of mine, in this heart on mine. They hunt me and that is my destiny the destiny of a hunted mind. Why should I put up with them? I ask myself, but myself is unable or unwilling to answer that question a complicated question that can have a very simple answer which eludes my mind, my thoughts are blurred and un-blurred it´s a grey area in which I have to live. There is no white and black. Life.

Life is my house, it revolves around it it speaks to it. My house. The house where dreams where made and broken were people lived and died, where laughs where mixed with tears, where I was born and educated, where values and principles slipped into every pour of my body.

I look out and have stayed out of the hunted house seeing the green prairie of life as well as the soaked red prairie of war, the privilege of learning and un-learning the seeds that make up the wonderful prairie of life. Is not all war says my ex-soldier soul. I created my life based on what I learned in my house. I return back to my house, it is hunted I can feel it every day I wake up, they are there, I feel them as much as a hammer hitting my soul, my heart, my mind. But it is Life. The Life I chose to live and now I have to cope with.