mental health

Military hat

Did the U.K went to battle with those hats? Had to be a bit uncomfortable,
they did use them in WWI the least I know. That´s freaky, corona coronaaaaa
(would wanted to say fuck out of here, but I got the message, better late than never,
and what´s up with those guys wearing that weird hat)


Don´t bull shit me, I know and you are a fucking whore,
yes whore, you guy that I met, talking about suicde…. talking….talking,
just do it punk. Got to proclaim your situation to everybody?
No wonder I smack the shit out of you, sorry chief but I have my life
and little that is, people to take care, so don´t fucking bullshit me and yourself.
I will kill you if you want that, I done it already in the army, but when I get in you face
you piss and shit your pants, fucking bitch. Although as I saw it was a bit of intervention.. a bit,
criminal kid looking for nothing good, now he goes off the grid, I was that one in my time,
probably am today, doubt it though, so no fucking 20 year old kid is going to talk shit,
help him? Yes, it is in my nature to help and also hit the shit out of them,
yet I know that if you yourself don´t want to help yourself.—,,,,
you are done.

Point being,

I´m antisocial

It doesn´t particularly means that I hate being around people,
just go to doctor Google, but it seems to me now looking back
there is a correlation with this GREAT poem.

Poem out of the top of my crazy head…..hit it!

is a disorder
for me was the order
been in the military
but not all the times
i did not want to avoid
i was good at my job
although i did shoot Bob

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.

I´m scared shitless


Tomorrow is the big day. Going to see a shrink because….
don´t you know I´m crazy ese? Don´t you know I´m “loco”?
I haven´t taken alcohol or other things in a couple of weeks
but,it´s a constant struggle. Why even bother to lie, I did fuck up
quite good at the beginning of the month when I received the paycheck from
the State, went on a spending spree of not good things.
Right now I´m in minus 285$ in the bank and
I´m not sure how I will be able to pay next months rent and all
because of the addiction. Funny thing that here in Spain since it´s
all public, we have universal health care, well it takes months for
you to get an appointment. So you ask months in advance and I guess this is my present for Christmas
seeing the psychiatrist, and see how he can help me with the addiction,
send me to an out patient program also a public one and all those kind
of things. And that scares me shitless. Plus I don´t know exactly if
I´ll be able to get the money back, but if I get my shit together with the addiction
thing, surely I won´t spend all that money.
The mental health specialist scares me shitless, period. A great life change for sure
if I want to stay sober and that scares me like a little girl.

Stay Frosty gents and gentesses.